When they say that there’s no crying in baseball, they aren’t referring to the fans of the Pittsburgh Pirates. It’s okay to cry if you are a Bucco’s fan. We’ve been crying for years. Decades. Even The Onion knows that we’re hurting. While they have various giveaways and fireworks at games all throughout the season, Fan Euthanasia Night really doesn’t seem all that bad. I mean, we really do need to be put out of our misery, don’t we?

I was raised a Pirates fan. Really, I was raised a Pittsburgh fan. I bleed black and gold, whether that’s the Steelers, the Penguins or, yes, even the Pirates. (Additionally, I don’t care about basketball. Ever.) I remember attending a game at Three Rivers Stadium in which a fellow softball teammate and I held up a sign that read, “Will you marry me, Andy Van Slyke?” Who cares that he would have been jailed for statutory rape? Those were the good old days.

I miss those good days. I miss Andy Van Slyke. So does the guy behind Where Have You Gone, Andy Van Slyke, aka WHYGAVS? I miss being proud of my team. God, I miss winning. I mean, yes, we beat the Cubs. In fact, we swept those Cubbies. One of those times was even a significant win. But the 20-0 loss during the Brewers series is still fresh in our minds. I’ve entered the Make Room for Crazy poll and I actually bet that This! Is! The! Year! At least the money goes some place worthwhile. Right? RIGHT?

Fans may be frustrated. I’m not. You know why? Pittsburgh Pirates shirts for my boys this year were 50% off at the beginning of the season. 50 percent off. Of clearance price. I’ll always be a Pittsburgh Pirates fan. But, man, I love me a sale. If they have a winning season (it could happen, right?), that means that the shirts next year might be only clearance price, not 50 percent off of the lowest possible price. Hopefully the recession will be over by that point. In fact, perhaps we should just blame the recession on the Pirates.

Why not?

View Original Post at draftdaysuit.com

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