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The Superbowl is over.  Over the past few weeks, I’ve seen articles and heard radio shows talking about grown men crying after the game.   There were laughs at crying over a game, and if and when it was okay for a man to cry.  I find commentators and fans generally annoying with things like this.  People who’ve never been in those situations, never sacrificed or known anything of that nature commenting on what is or isn’t appropriate…

But it started me thinking.  Perhaps this idea, those feelings are foreign to them.  How can someone possibly understand the depths of an emotion for something when they have never experienced it or have only a shadow to compare to it.  And then this got me thinking on my own training… As many of you know, I spend a lot time (too much?) in reflection, observation, and correlations.

I’ve decided it comes down to passion vs. interest.

There are many things people find interesting.  People love trying new things, meeting new people, picking up a new hobby.  Keeping life interesting adds fun and entertainment to life.  There are many hobbies I myself have tried to my hand at and some I was pretty talented at or enjoyed.  Some I invested some time into and money.  I painted, sculpted, sewed, knitted, tried snowboarding, bouldering/climbing, basketball, volleyball, softball, writing, and recently picked up an interest in guns… (just for the zombie apocalypse)

This is one of the best Christmas gifts ever! Now I'm ready to fight zombies

You can really enjoy your interests, be good at your interest (I’ve known talented all-american and top level athletes who just have a mild interest in what they do), and even dedicate time, energy and money in the pursuit of an interest.  But with interests, there’s only so much invested…  with interest, happiness or enjoyment is the most important thing you seek and it is what propels you.  So, you can get bored and walk away from it, when you come up to obstacle or set back you can walk away, you can really like it but if it feels like more work than fun you no longer enjoy it.  In the end, an interest is a passing phase or hobby to occupy time and you’re content with it.  Yes, it brings you some joy and it offers only mild disappointment.   There’s nothing wrong with interests.

Interest is safe and this is where most people stop.   Some  people have never moved beyond interest in anything in their lives.  They enjoy doing something but they wouldn’t cry about, when things feel too hard or life gets in the way they quit, they wouldn’t risk everything or sacrifice for it… so of course they can’t understand those who do.  But on the other hand, they’ll never experience the depths of emotions they could…

Passion is a double edged sword, giving as much as it’s getting…

There is a reason people rise to the top of their fields, no matter the area: sports, business, work, family life, music, whatever the pursuit.  I believe what separates these people is passion.

Passion is more than an interest.  It’s desire, dedication, drive, a hunger that propels you.  It’s more than about seeking pleasure or reward for the pursuit is the pleasure and is the reward.  When passion drives you, there is very little that stops you.  You get knocked down and again and again you stand back up.  There are no excuses, there is nothing to stop you, there is only the desire for the pursuit, for the finish.  Sacrifice and pain go hand in hand with unparalleled joy at times.  The only people who can truly understand passion are those who’ve experienced for themselves.  What have they loved so deeply, felt so intensely, or sacrificed so greatly for?

I have a passion for hammer throwing…  It feels silly and there are those who don’t understand why.  How can a 4k ball mean so much?  Do you get paid?  Are you famous?  is it fun? What do you get out of it?…

My passion for the hammer stems from it being the hardest thing I’ve ever done.  The pursuit is more than just a medal, prize money, a place in history… it’s the pursuit of conquering myself, seeing into the depths of what I am capable, knowing a world and life that I will never experience again.  It tests all things, my commitment, dedication, resilience, faith…

Every decision I’ve made in the last 13 years of my life has been influenced by my sport… where I went to school, what major or classes I took, where I lived, where I worked, how I spend my time, what I eat, what I do…  There are times that I feel lost or wonder what I’m doing.  There are times I feel the hard sting of failure or loss.  There are times when I question every decision I’ve made.  It hurts more deeply, failure and disappointment felt that much more acutely…

However, there are times when I feel things I can’t describe, an understanding of myself, a joy, a realization, an epiphany of sorts.  An inch in practice or a revelation brings an exuberance rarely felt.  I’m more knowledgeable of myself and my capabilities.  I know of what I am capable and who I am because I am tested and brings a confidence that will always be with me…  I’ve learned to “enjoy” (or at least appreciate) the process the good with the bad.

When I think back on making the Olympic team in 2008, the emotions running through me at the time are hard to explain…  I cried feeling a joy I have no words for because I had never felt anything like it… eight years of sacrifice, dedication, pain, choice, hard-work, blood sweat, tears and then all of that piled into one moment of accomplishment of the realization that I did it.  It meant more because of what I gave.  I wasn’t given a spot on the team, I earned it, I fought for it, it was mine and no one could take it away….

My passion still drives me, though I’ve had some rough few years, I still choose this everyday.

All the greats had this passion in their pursuits in life.  This is why we love to watch, to read, to know about this great figures in history isn’t it?   To taste that passion or see it personified?    John Wesley, a Christian theologian, once said, “When you set yourself on fire, people love to come and see you burn.” Passion can be so painful at times, but so beautiful at others…

And after I retire, I would like to take some time and enjoy some new pursuits and interests.   Hammer will have served its purpose and will always be with me.   But think I will find a passion for something else, a new test of sorts to grow as person…  But I know I need passion in my life, I couldn’t imagine a life without it (the good and the bad).  Why would anyone want to?

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